Falling in love with my Mum at the age of 56 was not part of my game plan. We had never been close. I grew up hearing, ‘You’re just like your father!’—the memory still a divisive wedge among many separating Mum and I. For eight years, I chose to have no contact with her.
She is now confined to her bed in a nursing home and preparing to make her transition back to spirit. And for the first time in my life, my heart freely flows love for her. This is a miracle.
In his book, The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know is Possible, Charles Eiseinstein contends that much of individualistic Western culture is based on the idea that ‘in your shoes, I would not do as you did, because I am different from you, separate from you’.
This false perspective, he says, results in our deeply ingrained tendency to blame and judge others as bad or wrong.
A growing body of evidence shows that when someone experiences the totality of another’s circumstances, they make exactly the same choices.
Now, whenever I feel that familiar self-righteous prickle, or hear myself thinking, ‘I don’t like that’ or ‘You are wrong’, I say to myself, ‘If I had that person’s psyche, situation and upbringing, I would have done exactly the same!’
As soon as I think it, the separation between us collapses and is replaced by a sense of our common humanity. Blame not only seems irrelevant—it becomes meaningless.
Recently I stayed overnight at my Mum’s nursing home. In the evening we sat together in pj’s watching TV and drinking damson gin. This is our ‘normal’ these days. Suddenly, Mum said something I had never heard her say before: ‘I am proud of you. Thank you for being who you are.’
The next morning, as I sat by her bed, I realized that I was liberated from a constrictive habitual way of thinking about my Mum. To flow such love for her was beyond any possibility I imagined. But I had said yes to a new perspective, and the Universe answered me with an unexpected, miraculous yes of Its own.
Try this: The next time you feel cross with someone, say to yourself, ‘In their shoes, I would behave exactly the same as they do’. The benefits will reach far beyond your own life. In an energetically interconnected world, when one person makes the choice to move beyond blame and separation, everyone benefits. Miracles happen.
Each choice for connection and compassion adds to the momentum of the ‘more beautiful world our hearts know is possible’.
By Jane Horton
Jane Horton feels immensely privileged to be alive as a New Story is born. She believes that humanity is moving to a new awareness of our power as the divine in physical form. Inspired by the natural world and her inner journey, she is a catalyst for birthing the new. A scientist, mystic, impressionist photographer and dancer, she runs Barefoot Dance sessions and celebrations in Herefordshire, England where people reconnect with their joy and playfulness. She loves walking on the nearby Malvern Hills, singing, soul connections with others, and is writing a book called The Adventure of Yes. firstname.lastname@example.org, www.adventureofyes.com
Edited by Melinda Gates (www.AwakeningToYes.com)